If there are any regular readers of this blog, I’m gonna have to apologize in advance. Buckle up, it’s going to be a wild ride. We’re surfing the emotions of a borderline after all, so it’s gonna be up and down like a goddamn tsunami. My wife is adding a psych certificate to her master’s, so I’ve been letting her speak for me to the loony ex. My wife has never seen a bigger borderline than my ex. She does clinicals in psych treatment facilities for christ sakes.

I’m so proud of my son. He has grown so much over the years, but not just physically or intellectually. His emotional intelligence is far greater than I expected from somebody his age. The biggest problem is that my psychotic borderline ex has no way of dealing with an emotionally intelligent person, so she just tries to wear him down. She tries to wear me down, too, but I don’t give a fuck and nobody can force me to give a fuck. Her feelings aren’t important to me, so all her abuse and attacks roll off my back like water off a duck.

I’ve been telling my wife for the longest time that it doesn’t matter at all what I say to the borderline ex, if what I say isn’t exactly what she wants she’s just going to attack, lie, and manipulate. There’s no getting through to her. It wasn’t until yesterday, after reading all these messages from just the last few days, that my wife fully realized what I’ve been trying to tell her for the longest time. She now understands why the only option is “no contact” with the borderline ex.

For me, the most heartbreaking possibility is that my son may one day also go no-contact. As a person who grew up with one parent, I know how hard it is. The one parent I had left also is a narcissist, and my wife believes my mom might have narcissistic personality disorder or be adjacent to that diagnosis. So I was effectively left with a single parent that I had to go “no contact” with, and I didn’t go no contact until I was in my 40’s. It was that hard to do something I needed to do for my own mental health, because of an imposed hardship by my father. I want my son to be able to be happy and healthy and still maintain relationships with his parents. It’s important to me deeply for both of my kids because of my own life experiences, and realizations I’ve had from them. But this crazy bitch isn’t doing anything but trying to shove the problem in a different direction. She’s trying to get diagnosed with everything under the sun except for BPD, which she was actually already diagnosed twice with at least. The only treatment is DBT. She outright refuses it. Completely. Fully rejects the only treatment for BPD. There’s no hope for her ever behaving normally in life. It’s going to put my son between a rock and a hard place, and there’s nothing I can do about it except support him fully in any decision he makes.

Life ain’t easy, that’s for sure.